The cup of hot white chocolate beverage which I am currently enjoying contains 20% of my daily recommended saturated fat. 20%. For one mug of hot chocolate. Sweet mother. I think Sarah, who gave me this product, is trying to kill me. Scary stuff.
On the upside, it's delicious.
In other news, I am not maintaining dullgloomy very well these days, as I'm sure is evident. I am of course dutifully writing daily on A Year in Haiku. That's gotta be worth something, right?
Monday, March 03, 2008
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Hey, Wheezie!
This evening, while standing in line at the cashier, a woman joined the line behind me.
Close behind me.
Now, under normal circumstances, the distance at which she stood wouldn't have been close enough to make me uncomfortable, but this woman was breathing rather heavily. Gaspingly. Raspily. And having a heavily gasping, raspy breather behind you doubles the "acceptable distance" requirements. The heavily gasping, raspy breather was therefore uncomfortably close to me.
Then she spoke. She spoke and said something head-shaking.
"Do you know where I can buy cigarettes around here?"
She asked for smokes.
The heavily gasping, raspy breather asked for smokes.
Now there's a good idea.
She even followed up by saying, "I just can't catch my breath!"
Do you have any idea how difficult it was to keep from saying, "Oh yeah. When you can't breathe, it's usually a good idea to smoke some more."
At this point, she started dropping all of her purchases, into a pile on the floor and grabbing a few more impulse purchases to add to the pile.
I made my getaway while I was still keeping silent on the whole thing.
Close behind me.
Now, under normal circumstances, the distance at which she stood wouldn't have been close enough to make me uncomfortable, but this woman was breathing rather heavily. Gaspingly. Raspily. And having a heavily gasping, raspy breather behind you doubles the "acceptable distance" requirements. The heavily gasping, raspy breather was therefore uncomfortably close to me.
Then she spoke. She spoke and said something head-shaking.
"Do you know where I can buy cigarettes around here?"
She asked for smokes.
The heavily gasping, raspy breather asked for smokes.
Now there's a good idea.
She even followed up by saying, "I just can't catch my breath!"
Do you have any idea how difficult it was to keep from saying, "Oh yeah. When you can't breathe, it's usually a good idea to smoke some more."
At this point, she started dropping all of her purchases, into a pile on the floor and grabbing a few more impulse purchases to add to the pile.
I made my getaway while I was still keeping silent on the whole thing.
Sunday, February 03, 2008
Puppy Love: Deadly Edition
You know what drives me nuts? (Stop! Stop listing things! It was a rhetorical question!)
People who choose to drive around with their dogs on their laps. That's right. People in the driver's seat who think it's somehow acceptable to have a living creature sitting on top of them while they're operating a motorized vehicle. Add to that the fact that they're doing so these days on roads covered with ice, slush, and snow, and I'm significantly more irritated.
Then I see the ShePound today and I get really steamed.
She's driving around, grinning like the Cheshire Cat (seriously, folks, she was about as crazy-jolly as they come) and was attempting to manoeuver her minivan around a corner with not one, but two dogs on her lap. And, though we're not talking great danes here, we're also not talking about tiny pipsqueak dogs (which would also bug me, so don't drive around with chihuahuas on your lap either). Definite mid-sized breeds. One is sitting on her lap, face pressed to the window while the other is somehow being clutched to her chest with one arm while she turns the wheel with the other.
You, my dear, are a raging idiot worthy of the accident you will someday have.
People who choose to drive around with their dogs on their laps. That's right. People in the driver's seat who think it's somehow acceptable to have a living creature sitting on top of them while they're operating a motorized vehicle. Add to that the fact that they're doing so these days on roads covered with ice, slush, and snow, and I'm significantly more irritated.
Then I see the ShePound today and I get really steamed.
She's driving around, grinning like the Cheshire Cat (seriously, folks, she was about as crazy-jolly as they come) and was attempting to manoeuver her minivan around a corner with not one, but two dogs on her lap. And, though we're not talking great danes here, we're also not talking about tiny pipsqueak dogs (which would also bug me, so don't drive around with chihuahuas on your lap either). Definite mid-sized breeds. One is sitting on her lap, face pressed to the window while the other is somehow being clutched to her chest with one arm while she turns the wheel with the other.
You, my dear, are a raging idiot worthy of the accident you will someday have.
Saturday, February 02, 2008
As Requested
Once upon there was a girl named Sonya. She liked to make sarcastic comments, dress in black, and generally give her mother cause for concern.
When Sonya grew up, she wanted to enter the World of The Arts, studying theatre and becoming a singer and actor.
One day, she said to herself, "Waitaminnit! Business! That's where the money is!" and so she became Management.
Now, she makes sarcastic comments, dresses in black, and generally gives her mother cause for concern. Some things never change!
Oh, Sonya! You minx you!
When Sonya grew up, she wanted to enter the World of The Arts, studying theatre and becoming a singer and actor.
One day, she said to herself, "Waitaminnit! Business! That's where the money is!" and so she became Management.
Now, she makes sarcastic comments, dresses in black, and generally gives her mother cause for concern. Some things never change!
Oh, Sonya! You minx you!
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Curious
I maintain -- with varying levels of consistency -- two little weblogs on this fine site.
I have noticed an odd little quirk of blogger, though.
You see, this weblog, this very dullgloomy is posted quickly and easily. When I press "Publish", up it comes, date- and time stamped accurately and automatically.
When I press "Publish" on A Year in Haiku, however, I must first go into "Post Options" to correct the time. Otherwise, it will be anywhere between three and four hours off. Strange, no?
I didn't say it was interesting, or even important in any way. Just curious.
I have noticed an odd little quirk of blogger, though.
You see, this weblog, this very dullgloomy is posted quickly and easily. When I press "Publish", up it comes, date- and time stamped accurately and automatically.
When I press "Publish" on A Year in Haiku, however, I must first go into "Post Options" to correct the time. Otherwise, it will be anywhere between three and four hours off. Strange, no?
I didn't say it was interesting, or even important in any way. Just curious.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Space Invader
So, I finish work tonight and head across the street to the parking lot in which my car was hanging out, waiting for me. I head through the lot, approaching the aforementioned vehicle and WHAMMO! What do I see? Someone, whom I can only assume is a card-carrying moron, has parked beside me on my driver's side. Right beside me. RIGHT BESIDE. About THREE INCHES beside me. Literally.
So, yes. I had to get in my passenger's side door, clamber over to the driver's seat in my MANUAL TRANSMISSION vehicle ... meaning I had to circumvent the seats, the stickshift, and the emergency break along the way to start my car. Of course, it had been snowing this evening, so I had to clean off the car. I ended up backing out into the aisle VERY VERY CAREFULLY (since there were mere inches betwixt the cars, you will recall) so I could get out my door and brush it off. (Of course, a van came by shortly and wasn't too happy with me for cleaning my car in the aisle of the lot, but deal with it VanBoy!)
And so, to the owner of a grey sedan who parked beside me, I say, "You're an idiot."
So, yes. I had to get in my passenger's side door, clamber over to the driver's seat in my MANUAL TRANSMISSION vehicle ... meaning I had to circumvent the seats, the stickshift, and the emergency break along the way to start my car. Of course, it had been snowing this evening, so I had to clean off the car. I ended up backing out into the aisle VERY VERY CAREFULLY (since there were mere inches betwixt the cars, you will recall) so I could get out my door and brush it off. (Of course, a van came by shortly and wasn't too happy with me for cleaning my car in the aisle of the lot, but deal with it VanBoy!)
And so, to the owner of a grey sedan who parked beside me, I say, "You're an idiot."
Friday, January 25, 2008
Fair Warning
Eleven months to Christmas, everyone. I hope you're planning for the holidays. They'll be upon us before we know it.
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